starspangledhero

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[video]

[ When the comm clicks on, America is looking a bit more hippie-ish than usual. At least he's clean now, but he's wearing beads galore, everything on him is painted or dyed, and he has some paint splashed on his face. ]

The People In Charge are givin' me my gifts, slowly but surely! Look-- the beads! Oh, and a whole tie-dye kit, and a box of chapstick! And now there's these things.

[ He sets aside the communicator as he sits on the floor Indian-style. America holds up one of the crystals to his face. He's staring very, very intently at it.

And then he licks it. ]

I wish I could turn into a buffalo. I wish I could turn into a buffalo. I wish--

[ MEMORY TIME YEAH. Anyone watching this video, you can now see the Roswell incident. I'd go hunt down the video but I'm lazy. Have a nice view of America coming across his alien bestie, Tony, who comes to comfort America after being distraught that no one would tell him about the aliens. ...Welcome to Hetalia, guys.

America's grinning, but he does appear a little exasperated. ]

C'mon, magic crystals! Gimme buffalo powers! Don't just show me stuff I've already done! Can't you even bring Tony here? Maybe this one is defective.

[ Another crystal is pulled from who-knows-where. He's probably been collecting them all day in hopes that they will give him powers and/or get him high. This time, instead of licking it, he shakes it like a snowglobe. ]

C'mooooooonnnnn magic buffalo powers!

[ America doesn't get magic buffalo powers. He gets a particular scene from the Revolutionary War. Namely, 2:52-4:30. Watching England cry over him is exactly what he wanted today. Except not. He wants his fucking buffalo powers.

Anyone watching may also care to notice that his grin has slipped away and his face has gone pretty blank. ]

Ah... this one's... broken too.

[ He tosses is behind him, grabbing a much smaller one from his pocket. It's probably too small to see what's going on with it, but as one of his hands fumbles to turn off the communicator, you can hear one last thing from it (because I am a depressing person):

"Can I call you Big Bwother?" ]

[ooc: I haven't seen Higurashi and I dunno the rules on multiple memories, but if this is wrong beyond all reason, just lemme know and I can fix it ;w;b ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

--Whoops.

You're right; I don't care. It'd be ridiculous if I was still whinging over something that happened centuries ago.

And for God's sake, will you kindly please shut up about the whole fur ball ability? It's disgusting, and I'd prefer to keep my dinner where it belongs.

[ a pause of horror. think of the germs, America. this is worse than swallowing a penny ]

Spit it out you gormless twat. Right now.

I can't exactly spit out something that's not in my mouth anymore!

...I still don't think I have buffalo powers yet.

Cough it up, right now.

I will come over and force you to if you don't. I swear to God I will.

What're you gonna do, stick your fingers down my throat?! Relax! It's coming out one way or another!

One way... or the other?

[ ...processing this ]

No.

[ ... oh god no ]

It'll get stuck in your lower intestine, cause internal bleeding and you'll die a horrible death and I'll be there to say I told you so.

Don't be so dramatic, I'm not gonna die. I don't... think.

[ pause for consideration. ]

I'd rather not bleed though. I kinda like my intestines. And I promised I'd never let them get abused again after what happened during the civil war!

[ you don't want to know. just know that the civil war museum of medicine has some crazy shit in it. ]

Die or not, you'll have to choke it back up. If you puke up a bear, a shard should be easy for you.

[ ... now I'm curious ]

Shards aren't fuzzy and cute.

[ two words: opium enema. also combined with opium pills, mercury, and lead. this was all given to one soldier as treatment. civil war medical mindset: OPIUM CURES EVERYTHING!!! ]

Neither is gastric bleeding.

[ ... oh America. WE WERE SHIPPING THAT STUFF TO THE CHINA FOR A REASON ]

What if it cuts my throat coming up?

[ AGE OF HEROIC MEDICINE. Which basically means IF IT'S FATAL, LET'S PUT IT IN YOUR SYSTEM. ]

It's got to come out one way or the other.

[ ... ] Was it the only crystal you had?

...Eughhhh. And I don't wanna repeat of the car thing.

It's the only one I swallowed. I've got some more I've collected.

Don't ever mention New Years again.

You should leave a few of them with me. God knows how clumsy you are, and they're probably safer in my care where they won't be eaten or licked or shook.

Even with the car, it was hilarious. Remember when your eyebrows were drawn back on?

I wanna see if I can watch Scooby Doo on them!

When I get enough evidence to prove you shaved them off, I'm going to kick you back into the 19th century.

Don't be stupid; you can't. But if you leave a few with me for safekeeping, I-- you can view them later in the future whenever you want.

... but only certain ones. I don't want any from that bloody war.

I don't remember doing anything, but I bet I was only the one who drew 'em back on, if only because I knew you'd look creepy without them. I'm a nice guy like that!

...We can throw out the one from that war.

But I still wanna figure out that lisp thing, and I gotta see if I keep wishing they'll give me powers, and.... and, well, I bet there's some happy memories here I'd like to see again!

Just toss them into the fire. It's the easiest way.

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1/2 SO MANY COMBOS