[voice; english] so sleepy will do tags in the morning

[starspangledhero]

[ Yes. It's that time. And probably the last post before he's back to normal. ]

ALLIED FORCES, ASSEMBLE!

Americans, Britman, Frenchman, Ruskies, Chinamen, Poles, Canadians... crap who else is allied with me. Anyone who isn't in the Axis Powers or neutral (which is just another word for pansies)! I've come to a disturbing conclusion:

There are a whole bunch of Japanese people here. Which is basically my problem, and China's since I have to rescue him from Japan's shenanigans. Due to Australia's absence though, you guys have to be my back-up!

Don't worry though, I haven't forgotten about Germany. I've got my eyes and guns trained on him too. He'll surrender soon enough! In the mean time, I'm gonna go spy on the Japanese. I'll disguise myself as a German. No one will recognize me. Not even you guys. But I'll give y'all a secret signal that says I'm me! Don't worry, I won't make the same mistake again.

...For the record, that salute thing he does is not an invitation for a hi-five.

Wish me luck!

[ Now he's off to go stare at people with a pair of binoculars with his hair slicked back and dressed in green. He is not a subtle spy. If you speak Japanese, Italian, or German, be warned. He is stalking you. And I will totes do stalking things once I've slept. ]

Comments

[starspangledhero]

TRAUNICHTESSTICHT!

[mygodmyright.livejournal.com]

Dummkopf.

[starspangledhero]

Eh?

[mygodmyright.livejournal.com]

You should get to learn it. You'll be hearing it often.

[starspangledhero]

I have a better plan! I'll pretend I'm deaf so they can't call me out on not understanding what they're saying!

[mygodmyright.livejournal.com]

[ ... that actually kind of works ]

It's still a stupid idea, even for you.

[starspangledhero]

You haven't seen how German I look.

[mygodmyright.livejournal.com]

All you really have to do is hold a wienerschnitzel in one hand, sulk about moodily, and Bob's your uncle.

[starspangledhero]

Helps that I'm blond and blue-eyed too!

Have you found Uncle Bob yet?

[mygodmyright.livejournal.com]

It doesn't help that you speak with an exceptionally heavy yank accent, and look stupidly optimistic.

It's a phrase, gitface.

[starspangledhero]

I'll keep my mouth shut like a deaf-mute and... hmm, optimism. I'll think about sad things to keep my face straight!

Uncle Bob lives in Phrase? Where's that?

[mygodmyright.livejournal.com]

Do you ever think before you speak?

[starspangledhero]

I have my moments.

[mygodmyright.livejournal.com]

[ SIGH. WHY ARE SO FRUSTRATING AMERICA ]

Oi bastard, I'll help you spy on the krauts. But don't get me wrong, it's all for my benefit. It's not as if I give a shite if you get caught and executed.

[starspangledhero]

Excellent! Good teamwork, England! I've got some extra gel if you need it for your hair, and I figure we can share a pair of binoculars.

[mygodmyright.livejournal.com]

I'm perfectly capable of disguising myself without hairgel. I'm a master of disguise, and my German is brilliant, if I say so myself.

[ ... ] I want to use them first.

[starspangledhero]

I get to use them first, but you can have them after me.

[mygodmyright.livejournal.com]

I have far more experience with espionage. Consider it part of lend-lease; give me the bloody binoculars.

[starspangledhero]

I want 'em!

[mygodmyright.livejournal.com]

I just bought them, you stupid bastard. They're no longer yours.

[starspangledhero]

What.




What. When did I sell them to you?!

[mygodmyright.livejournal.com]

About five minutes ago. You're obligated to assist me in wartime, and I've already promised to pay you back once this is all over.

[starspangledhero]

I did?














Fine. But you'd better pay me back with another pair of binoculars!

[ He's never getting them back is he. ]

[mygodmyright.livejournal.com]

Don't get me wrong, I'm only buying these because I've misplaced my personal pair.

[ never. maybe now America will stop his peeping tom business ]

... I'll make you dinner.

[starspangledhero]

Yeah, well, mine are better, so it's a good deal for you.

[ no then he'll just upgrade to satellites. or worse, he'll make mimic-binoculars with his hands. ]

...Not scones.