starspangledhero | ( video ) America: Greet the new arrival to the embassy

[ America pops up, all smiles as usual. The camera shakes a bit as he moves up the stairs to his apartment. ]

Yeesh, usually I check in more than this, but you know how it goes: busy taking down vicious beasts, throwing birthday parties, saving the city, the usual! Ah, hold on...

[ He fumbles in his pocket for a key, opening his door... ]

So earlier I had this really good idea for-!

[ This is promptly cut off by a scream. It is the scream of someone who is now witnessing their precious pet dog(dragonwolfmonsterhellbeast) being eviscerated and eaten. Actually, here, have a quick view of the scene while America presses himself against the wall: ...why, it's only Nepeta enjoying a meal consisting of monster meat! What's so terrible about that?

Fucking everything, damn it. That blood splatter on the floor was his pet. How would you feel if someone ate your dog? Not too hot. Even if the creature eating your pet happens to be a cute little troll girl who, at the moment, looks a bit like a pet who just got caught doing something they shouldn't. The irony of this situation continues to mount. ]

PUPPY, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! OHMYGOD IT'S EATING MY DOG!

[ Cue more incoherent screaming as he grapples for his shotgun. Amidst his struggling, the communicator switches off.

If you are in Marshall, you can probably hear his screaming. ]

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I'll probably see you there then.

[Avoiding the Catholic joke here just for bad taste, but damn is it tempting.]

Oh, cool, see ya there!

[ America will be on his way.

AND IF IT'S ANY CONSOLATION I KNOW WHAT JOKE YOU WANT TO MAKE AND I SNICKERED ANYWAY. ]

Will do, man.

[Marco will be half-waiting and mostly doing his "job" of being a bouncer, which he really takes to mean almost never leaving the bar.

\o/ I'm still waiting a Vatican APH >> But it's probably way too controversial or something. I'd still play him. Only Sealand is smaller!]

[ America will get there by the magic of time paradox. HE IS EVERYWHERE TONIGHT. And he is bundled up to the brim in winter clothing.

I just want Mexico to hurry up and show up so America can continue bitching about the Alamo properly. ]

Yo. [Waves when he gets there and vaguely makes sure there's a place open for him.]

[That will be amazing.]

[ sliiiiddeees into... whatever seat is available. whatever HE'LL TAKE A STOOL. ]

Hey.

[ wave wave. I am so productive with my tags. ]

[It helps having super talkative characters with obviously so much to say.]

What'll you take?

[See what I mean?]

[ Such a substantial conversation. America is at the top of his game tonight, clearly. ]

Uhhh, do you have anything other than the gross dark booze?

[Laughs.]

Yeah. We have some imported stuff. -- Though by imported I mean from other home worlds. I think Ace got most of the stuff from my word, but I'm not sure it'd be up to your tastes anyway. Got anything particular in mind?

[ Oh my god there's a possibility of alcohol that isn't dark water booze or Red Eye. ]

You got any Budweiser or rum or-- no, better, do you have Coca Cola?!

[ ALWAYS SUPERIOR TO ALCOHOL. ALWAYS. ]

Coca...Cola?

I'll check?

[Raids Shinjiro's stocks!]

[ ohmygodohmygodohmygod PLEASE HAVE COKE.

DO YOU SEE THIS ICON.

THIS IS HIS FACE AND THAT IS WHAT HE IS CHANTING IN HIS HEAD. ]

Only one I could find. Hopefully it's the right brand. [Hands him a small classic bottle cap style one they use in movies of malt shops from the 50s.]

Here, let me get a mug for that, eh.

It's.

Beautiful.

[ so perfect. ]

No it's okay, I don't need a mug! I like drinking straight from the glass!

[ and he is totally keeping the glass and bottle cap when he's done. ]

Ah, all right. Suit yourself, eh.

That is just cola, right? [Because One Piece really does have cola. And uses it for cyborg fuel. So special.]

[ ...cyborg fuel. Of course Cola fuels cyborgs it makes perfect sense. America will just be twisting off the cap with his hands (because you gotta use your super strength for SOMETHING) and takes a sip. ]

Tastes like it! Not exactly Coke, but still good! Thanks! Man, I haven't had an actual cola... I think the whole time I've been here!

Hah, glad to be of help then. I guess it's funny the things you take for granted back home.

No kidding. Earlier tonight the one thing that would've really helped cheer me up is going to a movie, but there nothing like that around here.

Movie?

How so?

That's usually what I do nowadays when I wanna be alone or wanna feel better. Even if it's a sad movie or a horror flick, it takes your mind off stuff. Plus they're fun and awesome!

But they don't have them here?

Nope! There's the theater, but it doesn't work, and the only thing we get on television are those freaky broadcasts every week. Would it kill them to play some Scooby Doo?!

Scooby what?

[ this. face. ]

Don't tell me you've never heard of Scooby Doo!

[Scary.]

Sorry? What's it about?

(no subject)

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