starspangledhero

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[Yep. Time's passed and now he's older whoo! The face staring at the camera is still a kid's though. Said kid currently has what looks like one of the older America's shotguns hoisted over the shoulder that isn't holding the communicator. His head is framed by open sky. He's obviously outside. (He's also pretty dirty, like any kid running outside should be.]

ENGLAND! ENGLAND! HEY ENGLAND!

Look! I've got weapons now! I can help you fight off France, I wont mess up again, I promise! This one's even better than that musket you left me. But I... hold on!

[America sets down the communicator, doing his best to angle it to have a view of the trees. Over his shoulder pops up the terrifying head of those dragon-wolf things. America doesn't seem too perturbed and it's not biting his head off, so there's nothing to worry about. Once he finally gets the camera where he wants, he stands up, aims the gun, and shoots at the trees.

It doesn't hit anything. He picks up the camera again, clearly embarrassed.]

I'm still practicing. Lt. Colonel Washington says I'll be really good at it someday, but I dunno. I'm still more comfortable with knives. Bad thing about this gun is that there's no bayonet. Teach me to shoot and we can both kick Big Brother France in the britches! I want land!

...

You can do most of the work though. He beat me up real bad last time I went after him.

Alright, Puppy, let's go!

[The wolf makes a creepy sound in reply and the two head off.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I remember an entire century. I remember more settlers, and England being away at sea for so long, and coming back hurt sometimes, and more towns were built and I got bigger!

[Sob it just gets worseeee.] I hope so. I'm not very good at fighting yet, and I know he's really happy to just read stories to me, but... I'm gonna be more than just materials and tobacco! Just you wait!

When we met, you claimed to be from the 1960's.

It's 1756. We met in 1587.

... Are you certain you're feeling... yourself?

How do you mean? I feel fine and dandy.

... As long as you feel fine, then.

'Course I do! Other than the whole not being able to shoot thing. But I'll get better! And England promised to read me a story tonight. It makes him happy so I don't mind that it's kinda a kiddy activity. [His life is full of tsun he's basically conditioned to it. Plus, Edgew wouldn't want to make a little kid cry, would he?]

You say you're brothers, are you not? Reading together is perfectly reasonable.

But why read about Robin Hood when I can be him?

Transcending the law to push the boundaries for the sake of the truth and justice is indeed a noble effort.

Um...

[OH GOD BIG WORDS.]

Yeah. I'll be noble and stuff!

...

Don't shoot anyone with that gun!

I won't shoot good people. Just the French. And maybe Indians.

You will do no such thing, shooting the French! Or the native people.

...

If there were any in Discedo.

It's quicker and easier than hanging.

Those sorts of ideals are barbaric.

Nuh-uh! When England talks about barbarians, he talks about France and him going around killin' everyone and some guy named Russia and putting heads on spikes. [and still, little America is less violent than any of the other countries at this age.]

Murder is barbaric, Mr. Jones.

It's not murder, it's war.

And as necessary as war may sometimes be, it's the most barbaric circumstance of all.

Are you a Quaker?

N--no. I don't follow any sort of religion.

Cuz you sound like one!

I'm no radical pacifist, but I fail to see what issue there is in my dislike for murder and death.

I told you, it's war! And you're just not used to death.

And it's odd. Lots of people go to hangings.

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what the hell that icon ;A; /snuggles it forever

IT IS ADORABLE LITTLE AMERICA. DON'T DENY HIS CUTENESS

/SNUGGLES HIM ;;

/SQUIRMS no he doesn't secretly enjoy attention what are you talking about

YOU MEAN NOT SO SECRETLY

sob he's as subtle as a brick flying at your head

what'll really twist your knots is this: what if a ninja threw it?

then the brick will have whistles attached to it

american innovation at its finest! :Dd

it's only slightly less ridiculous than the canon gay-gun

... I'm not sure anything can trump that

NOTHING CAN TOP THE GAY GUN haha top. get it.

... LOL i-it probably hit Edge square between the eyes

edgeworth's blood was used to program it.

laksdjfalkdf /spittake. He deserves a medal for his contribution to military victory.

what contribution. it did nothing but make america gayer :|

CONTRIBUTION! 8Dd

YOU ARE THE REASON SAN FRANCISCO EXISTS

OBJECTION. unless edge's dna was time traveled back. or his ancestors were in the closet.

his ancestors were so far in the closet they were actually the first humans in Narnia

if I hadn't read the magician's nephew I might believe you 8<

dude it's been ages since I've read the Narnia books I don't even remember the plots